Dueling Class Mishaps
by DracoMalfoy456
Summary: Dueling class at Hogwarts goes terribly wrong with the incompatent Professor Lockhart leading it. Completely AU.


A/N: Hello! This is a play/skit me and some friends wrote a few years ago for a camp. We had 5 girls, and had to have a five minute long skit. It's not that great, but we were eleven, and only had 2 weeks to write this. I wrote most of this, but I had help. The beginning is something I wrote today, just so you guys understand what is going on, and when this takes place. It does not follow the book at all really, but you should know that by the fact everyone is a girl. Please, enjoy.

It was second year at Hogwarts, and everything was astray for Mary Potter. She had missed the train with her best friend, Rona Weasley, forcing them to take a flying car to Hogwarts. In the process, they had gotten caught, and got in trouble. As the year progressed, things only got worse. As it turns out, there is a monster in the school that has been petrifying kids, mainly muggleborns. Her own friend Hermione Granger had been petrified as well. It was turning out to be a really horrible year for Mary. But worse still, they had to take dueling lessons with the incompetent Professor Lockhart. And if that wasn't horrible enough, they had to take the lessons with the Slytherins, including her enemy, Draca Malfoy.

*Mary and Rona walk into class, talking to themselves about this or that. Draca and her friend Victoria Crabbe were already seated. They noticed Mary and Rona, and whisper loudly enough for our hero's to hear*

Draca: Mary Potter? More like Mary Otter. [[ A/N: Sorry for the lame joke, I was 11 at the time I wrote this, and I couldn't think of anything else. .-. ]]

*Mary hears this, and gets slightly angry, but decides to be the bigger person, and ignore it. She and Rona take a seat at the front of the class.*

Draca:*Draca continues her bash on Mary; She says in the same loud whisper* I mean do you see who she's friends with? That horrible buck-toothed Mudblood, and that little ginger blood traitor. Both are poor excuses for witches.

Mary: *Having enough of the insults, stands up to curse Draca, when Professor Lockhart comes in. Rona pulls Mary back down.*

Lockhart: Alright class! Settle down! Now, today, we're going to learn how to duel! First, we must go over the rules. Rule one! No maiming your opponent, use defensive spells only! Rule Two! If I say to stop, you will stop immediately! And Rule three! Any misbehaving will be severely punished! Have you all got that?

Everyone: *In a bored voice* Yes Professor Lockhart.

Lockhart: That won't do, do you all understand the rules? Repeat them to me!

Everyone: *In a slightly less bored, more annoyed voice* No maiming, defensive spells only, you say stop, we stop, misbehaving will be punished.

Lockhart: Good! Now, I need two volunteers

*Both Draca's and Mary's hands shot up first*

Lockhart: Mary, Draca. Excellent! Come up here you two.

*Mary and Draca stand up, and walk up to the platform, facing each other, wands at the ready.*

Lockhart: Now, on the count of three. One, two-

Draca: *Before Lockhart says three, Draca shouts out,* Dancius! [[ A/N: We created a bunch of spells, mainly by adding –ius at the ends of words.]]

Mary: *Mary's legs start moving uncontrollably in a furious jig. As she's dancing, Draca and her friend Crabbe are laughing at Mary. Mary manages to get a hex* Tickelus!

Draca: *Draca doubles over in a fit of laughter*

Lockhart: Enough! *Does a spell to reverse the effects of all hexes.* Did you not hear me when I said no offensive spells? Now, we will try this again, after a quick break.

Mary: *Walks over, and sits down besides Rona*

Rona: *Starts rubbing Mary's shoulders, hard.* Don't worry Mary, you'll be beat her this time.

Mary: *Flinches at the force of Rona's rubbing* Stop Rona, that really hurts.

Rona: *Removes her hands hurriedly* Oh! Sorry Mary.

*At the same time, Draca returns to her seat, and talks quietly with Crabbe, smirking lightly at Mary and Rona.*

Lockhart: Now! Are you both ready? Perhaps I should teach you the spell to disarm your opponent… It is Expelliarmus, alright? Now, on the count of three. One, Two Three!

*Draca and Mary shouts out a spell as soon as Lockhart says three, at the same time *

Draca: Ropeus! [[ A/N: wraps someone up in ropes. I know there is a spell already for this, but we didn't remember it, and didn't have the books with us to go look it up.]]

Mary: Expelliarmus!

*Draca's spell misses Mary, but Mary's hits Draca. Her wand flies out of her hand. Mary runs forward, and grabs her wand. Crabbe stands up, and is about to curse Mary when Rona stands up, and fires a curse at Crabbe,*

Rona: Firius [[ Fire-us]]

*Rona's spell hits Draca instead of Crabbe, and she(Draca) catches on fire. She screams, as Crabbe tries to help her by beating the 'flames' with her hands before she remembers the water spell*

Crabbe: Aguamenti! *She manages to put the fire out. Draca, who is now wet, is mad, and runs forward to hit Mary. Lockhart stand between them*

Lockhart: ENOUGH! Detention, all of you! Class dismissed! *Lockhart then turns, and begins cleaning up*

Everyone: Aw man!

*Mary and Rona, Draca and Crabbe start walking away, each group talking to themselves, when they come up with an idea. Both groups turn simultaneously, and shout out a hex*

All students: FROGUS!

*Lockhart turns into a frog, and the students run up to it.*

Draca: Aww, it's so cute! *She picks up the frog.*

Mary: I know! *She pets the frog* Ah, gross! It's all slimy!

*They all start walking off together, laughing, and petting the frog*

The End.

A/N: … This really sucked, right? . Sorry, we wrote this at age eleven, and we weren't the best… If anyone wonders, I played Mary. We added the ending, so we could have a nice conclusion, and have them all be friends. I hope at least one person liked this, if so, my job is done. :3 I was bored today, so that's why I decided to write this all out. Hope you enjoyed.


End file.
